Couldn’t be me!
THEY say a good woman— or man — in a relationship should always aim to please, after all, compromising and giving of yourself is key to helping your relationship thrive.
And so, when we’re in unions we have to give and take — many times giving more than we take — in order to make the other person happy. But in giving and taking, how much is too much? What’s some weird relationship thing that you’ve seen others do, that you couldn’t see yourself doing?
Shernet, 35, married:
Cooking traditional Jamaican food — that life is just not for me. If my husband doesn’t want me to embrace the modern age and technology, and use or purchase items that will make food preparation easier and quicker, I couldn’t deal with that. It couldn’t be me, blending coconuts or peeling green bananas. Couldn’t be me!
Heather, 26, engaged:
I couldn’t see myself searching my partner’s phone, getting his passwords, or stalking his social media the way I’ve seen some women do. I don’t even care if he adds me or follows me on social media, as I believe in some things, we should be independent beings. So I don’t see myself as a social media couple or anything like that.
Alexia, 23, single:
Joint bank accounts are bad, as someone in the legal field I can tell you that. What’s yours is yours, and what’s mine is mine. Never, and I emphasise NEVER, join your finances with your spouse, because it never, ever ends well.
Janice, 40, married:
Dual Facebook accounts are the worst. Everybody doesn’t need to know that you have a family account, it’s all so weird to me.
Sheveena, 32, separated:
Embracing male-female roles in the relationship, which often, of course, means that the woman is paying the greater price. This is all BS — why should I be picking up after a man-child just because I’m the wife, doing his laundry, including the underwear with the skid marks, while he does the bare minimum? Women have been normalising this for so long that men think it’s OK to be basic.
Jhanelle, 30, single:
Staying in a relationship where the sex is bad, just because they’re a nice person. This is not OK. Too many people are unhappy and bored, but stay because they don’t want to hurt the other people. If you’re a deadstock, I’m letting you know, and if you don’t try to fix yourself and please me, I’m kicking you out the door.