Karma: The boomerang effect

AS children our parents would have encouraged us to be kind, respectful and compassionate to others because they know that life is like an echo, and whatever you send out into the universe will come right back to you. Unfortunately, not all of us take heed of these lessons and come face-to-face with dealing with our own version of the suffering that we bestow on others, as the people below share.

Karey, 29, construction worker:

I was with a girl, she is from a nice family and has a lot of ambition. I really checked for her, but I was there taking care of her and helping her out and she was cheating on me with another man. The man even sent others to threaten me. My family said I should forget about her and it took time, but I eventually did. I heard later that he abused her and then discarded her, and my friends are telling me how she is now begging for my number and asking for me.

Tanisha, 42, grad student:

I terminated four pregnancies in my 20s, and I didn’t even think twice about doing them even though my partners at the time would have supported me. One boyfriend begged me, literally bawling, not to do it, stating that he would raise the baby alone. But I was totally selfish — I just didn’t want to be tied down — even though I didn’t even take precautions to prevent pregnancy. The last termination was extremely difficult on my body. I got very sick because I think something went wrong. Fast-forward to today, I’ve become a Christian and I’m now married. We have been trying for three years to get pregnant with no success, even though there is nothing medically wrong.

Ameika, 23, university student:

When my mother died, I sunk into depression. It was terrible and the woman whom my father moved in with us made me miss my mother even more everyday. She and her daughter mocked me about wetting the bed, instigated beatings from my father by showing him my horrible grades, and overworked me because she said I would end up being someone’s housewife anyway. With the help of my guidance counsellor and external therapists whom she set up for free, the grip of depression slowly loosened. I started doing so well, started getting involved, and at this time my stepmother tried keeping me from school. At the end of the day, I ended up with a scholarship for university after sixth form. I am doing well now and she is so ashamed that the same people whom she badmouthed me with, she has to be telling of my success, even though she did not contribute to it. Her child, by the way, is on her way to becoming a permanent housewife.

Tony, 25, taxi driver:

I was with my babymother for a few years, then she became good friends with this girl, who would visit our house often. The girl and I got together, and I left my babymother for her. It was rough on my babymother, but her friend and I seemed more compatible. We eventually had a daughter together, and she would travel every summer and work, then return home with goods to sell. Everything went well for a few years, but then her overseas visits started getting longer. I found out that she had met and married a man and he had filed for her when I came home one day and she had disappeared, leaving our child with my mother.

Kwis, 25, legal assistant:

I was home alone and woke up about 9:00 am. I put on a towel and decided to take a bath, but I soon realised that my younger sister had smuggled my bag from my room and took it to school. Wanting to exact revenge, I thought her lesson would be best learnt if I hid something of hers outside. I went outside excited, still wearing my towel, eyes still ‘matty’, face unwashed and teeth unbrushed. Long story short, the breeze slammed the door and I was locked outside for the day. I had to hide at the back of the house until someone came home.

Lancelot, 39, veterinary assistant:

I had been married for just a couple years to my high school girlfriend when I met Nordia. She was everything my wife wasn’t — spontaneous, fun, independent, exotic, sexy, and from the moment I met her, I regretted getting married so young. Nordia wouldn’t entertain the thought of having a relationship with me while I was married, so I told my wife that it was over, that I never loved her, and that everyone should be given a chance to be with their soulmate, and I filed for divorce. My wife was devastated and my family took her side, and practically disowned me. We didn’t have any children together so I didn’t see what the big deal was, because why would someone remain in a relationship they were miserable in, when they had a chance at happiness? Well by the time the divorce came through I was even more convinced that Nordia was the woman for me; I’d never met anyone whose stars were so perfectly aligned to mine. We dated for a year — blissful courtship — then we got married, and I can say that on the exact day of the wedding was when she did a Jekyll and Hyde. I realised too late that she just wanted a ring and the wife status at all costs, and that I had jumped right into hell. We’re still married, even though we’ve been separated for years, because she has threatened that she will take everything I own and ruin my life if I ever think of divorcing her, and I believe every word.

Derick, 36, teacher:

My girlfriend of two years was not only loyal, but supportive. She was very focused, talented and smart. I started college and even though she had her studies doing, she helped me and supported me. Even though we had a good relationship, I realised I could also get into a relationship with a really pretty, popular, well-off girl from another school and my girlfriend would not find out too easily. When she did, I denied it, strung her along, used her, called her names and I became very unattentive. And so we barely spoke, all the while I was entertaining my new belle. Anyway, I told her and it broke her. I would check in on her every now and then, messing more with her emotions. I knew I was her first love and could have her back, or at least would have a really good chance of doing that. The other girl and I were together for several years, and the stories of her unfaithfulness and flirting ways came in, but of course I thought people were just jealous. I gave her all she asked for, I was that weak to her. Then one day she ended it. She came up with a few excuses and was on her way. I got what I deserved and though I pine over my ex, I know I deserved it for the way I treated her.