Kiki’s story: Of drugs, losing a child, and bouncing back
MANY persons know her as the bubbly, energetic and vibsey, television host of the programmes Intense and Digicel Rising Stars’ Chill Room. Others know her as a deejay on FAME, a voice in commercials or even Gloria (the teen) in the film Glory to Glorianna. But what a number of persons do not know is that the attractive Kerie-Ann Lewis, known to Jamaicans as KiKi, made one bad choice in the past that has impacted tremendously on her life ever since.
“At 18 I just got caught up on the wrong side of the fence,” Lewis told All Woman. “I wanted stability, and me searching for stability lead to me getting involved in drug trade — basically as a courier. It turned out how it turned out and I did do some time behind bars. From that experience I faced a lot of unexpected road blocks — the loss of a child — well not the loss — but not being able to take care of my child the way I wanted to, and the loss of my father. And since I have been back home the loss of jobs,” she revealed.
After being held at New York’s JFK International Airport with 8.5 kilos of cocaine concealed in beauty products in her suitcase, Lewis was charged and locked-up for 16 months. Prior to her travel, she was told she was only transporting 3kg.
“I was told 3kg by the owners simply because they wanted to pay me less. I was shocked to hear of the real amount. Everything was really a mystery. It was really a business transaction so you did not even know the people you were dealing with,” she said.
While behind bars she discovered she was pregnant and gave birth to a son while still incarcerated. However, her first born was taken away from her and she was slapped with an additional charge of child endangerment.
This, Lewis explained, was because the forms she had filled out stating who should care for the child upon his birth, did not find their way to the hospital, thus it was believed she deliberately did not make preparations for the child’s well being. According to the American law, she endangered the child.
After serving time, Lewis was deported back to Jamaica. And today, after 10 years, she is still not able to visit the United States.
Lewis decided that her experience may be able to change the minds of other young persons contemplating drug trafficking. Thus the filming of a one-hour long documentary entitled Our own locked up abroad, produced by Advance Media Production. This speaks to events leading to Lewis’ arrest, her life behind bars at the Passaic County Jail in the United States, the reformation she went through, and the tear-welling experience of losing a child.
“Going public is something I have always wanted to do since it happened,” Lewis said. “Initially it was a concern for people around me, they kept telling me that I shouldn’t because I don’t really want to tarnish my reputation and so I held off, but now I am at a point in my life where I feel I really want to talk about it and share the experience — if it can help someone, that’s fine and it makes me feel liberated,” Lewis said.
According to Lewis, it was after starting the documentary that she became aware of the number of persons out there still attempting to transport drugs.
“That was like a major shock to me,” she said. “I was talking to a young lady and she told me she would do it in a heartbeat! They are oblivious to the risk that it entails,” she said.
Thus getting into schools and sharing her experience with youngsters is a dream she also intends to follow through on.
Whether or not opening up her life to everyone will in fact ruin her, is a risk she is willing to take.
“Where I am right now outweighs the risk that can possibly come from it,” she said confidently.
She explained that many times when persons heard someone had been in jail, it becomes a road block for them since jail is associated with hardened criminals like murderers and rapists, but not for petty crimes or drug traffickers.
“With that mindset and that stigma, they question your credibility without getting to know you,” she said.
Lewis explained that she has had up to four jobs taken away from her, including one major contract two years ago as a result of news getting out that she did jail time.
This she explained was another reason she decided to go public.
“I was just tired of it. You just have to embrace your past, you can’t escape it,” she said. “You have your experiences but they are your experiences and you went through them. And you either take the lesson or you don’t; in this case I am really happy that I did,” she said with a smile.
Joan Wright, Lewis’ friend and producer of the documentary, said putting her past out there for all to see is a matter of taking back the power from those who believe they have it — those who would want to use it against her.
“It is almost as if you have to be paying for the crime twice,” Wright said. “It is a matter of taking back the reins on your life, taking back the power from those who have it.”
In the documentary, scheduled to be aired in the Caribbean this week and in Jamaica shortly, Lewis speaks about the pain of being forced to give up a child.
But despite not having the powers of decision in his life, she said she is allowed to see him whenever he wants and vice versa, since the US court later awarded full custody to his paternal grandparent. However, today he is like a stranger to her.
Not being able to take full part in her son’s life, she said has been a tremendous strain on her.
“It is still a very painful topic. Them having custody and you not necessarily knowing what that custody entails,” she said sadly.
An abusive childhood
“I still have to say that my parents did the best that they could,” she pointed out. “Parenting is not easy,” she laughed. “You do trial and error and you learn as you go. Growing up was hard because it was very dysfunctional, my parents tried their best, but I don’t think they spent enough time working together as a unit. As an only child, I think my mom had her idea of who she wanted me to be and my dad had his idea of who he wanted me to be. So there were a lot of ups and downs.”
Added she: “But I had a lot of good people around me and that helped in keeping me anchored. So even though I went wayward at 18, I still had the morals and principles and the concept of what normalcy should be like in a family environment.”
But her home was far from normal. “One minute you would be having a nice conversation and the next minute somebody is just flying off an angle about something. It was just constant argument where no one could agree on anything.”
Not only were arguments a norm in her household, but there were the regular periods of physical abuse, directed at both herself and her mom.
“My mom and my dad would go at it a lot! My father was an alcoholic and would beat my mom regularly.”
Lewis recalled once when the beating directed at her as a child was so severe that she was knocked unconscious.
But despite the fact that her father was abusive, this Lewis said, was only one side of him. As an only child and outside of his drinking, she was ‘daddy’s pet’.
“He was the one who kept my childhood alive, he is the one who spent time talking to me. He loved me unconditionally. So I learnt from an early age that you have people, they have their faults, but you can’t just use one bad thing to judge them overall.”
Lewis explained that her parents loved each other but in an unhealthy way. “They loved each other but they warred like there was no tomorrow! I call it ‘unhealthy love’. When I started getting mouthy I started responding to him. At 15 I just started standing up to him.
“At age 15 I just got up and left. I went abroad to my friend Debbie. And Debbie was so young and yet still she did so much. She decided to take me into her house until she realised it was a little too much and she sent me back home. But I was determined that I was not going to stay at home. Home was not where I wanted to be. I really wanted to have a place of my own where no one could bother me.”
During her incarceration, Lewis’ father died in an accident, one week before her release.
“I came back to Jamaica the night of his wake, and buried him the next day,” she said. “That was really, really painful.”
Since her deportation to Jamaica in 2000, Lewis did odd jobs in the insurance and hotel industry. She was later introduced to television (Music Plus) by Kevin Lee who directed the video Everyone Falls in Love Sometimes by Tanto Metro and Devonte.
However, her first major job was at FAME FM as a broadcaster and deejay. It’s an experience for which she said she is very grateful.
“Being at FAME opened doors for me. From there things kind of took off. Paula-Ann Porter introduced me to Francois and who liked my vibes and he gave me a chance,” she said. She also spoke of her gratitude towards Sharon Schroeter who was instrumental in sealing her position in the Digicel Rising Stars’ Chill Room and with Intense.
“I am really grateful to those who helped me in my career despite everything,” she said.
Today she is in the process of getting the documentary out and moving on with her life, doing even more TV.
“Incarceration is not something I am proud of. If I could change anything, it would be having my son in jail. But I wouldn’t want to change having him,” Lewis explained.
The entertainment personality who has been married to Denvo Thombs for two years, is expecting her third child. She proudly declared that her husband has become her rock, someone who is very supportive of her.
