You’ve asked and we’ve answered! Welcome to your weekly column ‘Planning Your Happily Ever After’ with wedding consultant Shikima Hinds.

Dear Shikima,

Please help me! I want to understand why it is that everything with the word “wedding” attached seems to come with such a high price tag. I host events all the time, I can’t wrap my head around it.

Confused,

Alicia

Bride-to-be

Hello, Alicia,

Weddings can be expensive, it’s true, but it’s not because wedding pros are trying to rip everyone off. I’m going to break it down for you from a planner’s perspective — it’s because you’re throwing an extra-fancy party for a lot of people. You are not just paying for the product or service that the wedding professional is providing for your special day, but also for their skill, talent, and time.

One fact that often startles a newly engaged couple is that the cost of certain elements of a wedding is considerably higher than for other events, like corporate parties or family gatherings. Here’s why: Unlike most markets, wedding goods and services are usually and most likely a once-in-a-lifetime purchase.

When the bride is walking up the aisle, there’s no “take two”. There is no option to mess things up. The stakes are high, and the vendor has to execute flawlessly. No one wants to live with the fact that they missed a monumental moment on the client’s special day.

I know a lot of wedding professionals; many are wonderful people who do amazing work and have no intention of ripping anyone off. They do their best to find a fair price and not take advantage of the fact that this is usually a couple’s first time shopping for wedding prices and information.

Many wedding vendors don’t post prices on their websites and the familiarity and transparency we rely on for other purchases just isn’t there. Once a couple gets to the planning stages, they quickly realise that weddings are a whole lot different.

I’m not ready to defend all vendors in the industry. I’ve seen vendors shamelessly tug at the emotions of couples, encouraging them to splurge on “the big day”.

Many vendors typically spend hours over periods of months working out the details of a couples’ ceremony and reception.

Many seasoned vendors have an average of at least 100 weddings under their belt and are masters of making sure things go correctly and smoothly.

Things you are paying for but don’t see:

1. Insider knowledge

Vendors regularly communicate among themselves behind the scenes for your particular celebration to ensure things go perfectly. For example, the placement of the bar will affect the décor floor plan; the colours of your flowers may determine the intricate details on your wedding cake. The music and audio may affect your videographer’s position when capturing special moments.

2. New ideas

Fresh ideas and inspiration are born somewhere. Original ideas can’t be found online, whether it is a unique combination of flowers or a memorable food presentation. Brainstorming takes time and creativity.

3. Business expenses

Many vendors need to account for all the overhead costs of running a business: The website, phone bills, e-mail, assorted software programmes to manage events, timelines, customers, and accounting. There are a lot of expenses associated with running a business. And of course the support staff, the admin assistants, the drivers and transportation costs, the cost to store items for the wedding, and the per diem are all factors in the fees charged.

4. Time and skills

There are so many talented professionals who use their hands for work. The calligrapher who writes the entire seating chart by hand or the cake decorator who crafts each flower petal so it appears real or the florist who brings each centrepiece design to life. These things take hours of skilled work.

5. Post-wedding tasks

The work isn’t done just because the wedding is over. There is a lot of follow-up with vendors, family members and more, the checking and returning of rental items. These are all a significant part of the wedding vendor costs.

Conclusion

So, are weddings over-the-top expensive? No. It’s the cost of knowing that your day will have excellent, professional vendors that will ensure that everything runs smoothly, and you won’t need to worry about anything except enjoying your special day with loved ones.